Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Tell Us Tuesday aka Why I Don't have a problem with Downton Abbey, and Why I DO have a problem with 19 Kids and Counting...

Linking up with Courtney today for this weeks TUT:) I think this is my second or third wk of linking up.

This post talks about two very (sort of) controversial shows that I watch. These are especially controversial in the Christian community. I really don't have a reason for doing this, except to blab my mouth off:)

A lot of people (mainly Christians) have been talking about how "bad" Downton Abbey (from here on will be known as DA) is. I actually read (and re-found it) this post a few months ago (before I even decided to try it out), on why she doesn't watch DA, and I was impressed with what the writer had to say. So much so, that I actually, for that moment, decided that I shouldn't watch it. Then I decided that I would try it out for myself. I have just finished the second season, and I have a (fairly) good handle on the show. The verdict? I don't have a problem with it. I (sadly) have watched worse shows than this. ER/Grey's have dealt with more than their fair share of gay-related story lines. Yes, I kind of wondered whether I should watch it after I saw Thomas kiss his (who WAS he, anyway?) lover. But that was all. There hasn't been any other mention of it. Yes, the daughters are selfish, but they have since become a lot less selfish. Sybil is a nurse, and the other two are well...just not as selfish. The father has a bit of a thing with Jane (the maid) but thankfully, it doesn't go too far, and she leaves. Thomas is always up do to no good, but usually he is found out. With the Black Market food he got for Mrs. Patmore, it was all rubbish. He had wasted all of his money! I think that was funny. He got was he deserved. For everything bad thing that someone does, it either sorts itself out (as in, nothing else comes of it) or something bad happens (remember when Mary slept with Mr. Pamuk, and he died in her bed, and they had to move his body out?), and they have to deal with it in a not-so-conventional way. I rather think it is funny the way that things can play out after someone makes a bad decision. Anna and Sybil marry the ones they loved. But I think the thing I love most about it (other than the era it is set in...the castle, the clothes, the pretty things), is on how the upstairs family is SO kind to the downstairs staff. Earl Grantham paid for Mrs. Patmore to get her cateracts fixed. Mary let Anna and Mr. Bates have their wedding night in a special room (and they waited until they got married to do the deed..another plus). They are friends. They tell each other stuff. Sometimes, with no one else. So, yes, there are things that go on in that show that maybe aren't the best, but what about everyone who watched HP? The Hunger Games? Those deal with witchcraft and violence. As a Christian, I don't have a problem watching DA.

Another show I wanted to talk about (and can be seen as controversial) is 19 Kids and Counting, which from here on shall be known as the Duggars. I have watched this show since it's inception. I think I watched it when it was a special on Discovery Channel, as it was called "14 Kids and Pregnant Again". I think she was pregnant with Jackson. I have always liked them, even though they were a bit odd. And not just the fact that they had 19 children. I have always wondered what "religion" or faith (as my preferred word is) was. Are they Mormon? Church of God? Fundamentalist Christian Doctrine? Just overly modest and involved in their kids' lives? From watching them the last few years, they seem to believe in pretty much everything I believe. But this last season really got me thinking. For the record, hubby and I both love this show, and we will continue to keep watching it. For one, we love the kids, and two (among many others), it is one of the few clean shows that is on TV (yah, we're looking at your, Sister Wives, Honey Boo-Boo, and Toddler's and Tiara watchers!). The kids are so sweet, and we both always have a good laugh.

Here is a link that I saw and read the other day; this will take you to the blog post.

Here are my few..how shall I say it, qualms? I have with the show.

For one, JB (the dad) is just plain annoying. He talks to the kids like they are babies. The way he talk in general is annoying...like he is talking to a small child, or someone who isn't understand of what he is saying. Michelle is so sweet, but even then, she is just too sweet. Does she ever yell at the kids?

A lot of what the Duggars do and believe are the same things (views) that I grew up with. I am the oldest of 7. We helped raise the younger kids, as the older Duggar kids do. But that is where the similarities end. We "helped" raise them. We didn't raise them. Yes, there were days where we looked after the kids all day, and we did our chores...dishes, garden, etc. But our parents were deeply involved in our upbringing. Yes, we helped, but they did 90% of the child rearing. We kids had our nights out with our friends, we didn't have to help with the kids all.the.time. Now, I get that there are more kids. But what is wrong with an evening away for your sibs? Nothing IMHO. I know Michelle does do A LOT...but let the older kids be kids! I know we don't see EVERTHING, and they may do more than we see, but from what I see on TV, it looks as though they don't have a whole lot of time to themselves. When they go out as a family, I can totally understand the older kids being a "buddy" to the younger ones. That's just logistics.

Another qualm I have with the show is how little the kids go out. On TV, the only time they go out is either with their family, or Anna's (their SIL) family, or with another pre-approved family/friend that the parents have authorized as "ok". We could have We could go out (youth group, parties) as long as my parents were at least sort of aware of who was there, and what it was about. Of course, they wouldn't have liked it if we had gone to a drinking party, but we wouldn't have wanted to, anyway. I don't even think the kids go to a youth group. They need to get away, and have their own teenage time. They even share their rooms with their younger (same sex) siblings. Yes, I shared a room, but with only sib at a time. And it was never for longer than a year or so.

Another is Courting vs. Dating. Now, don't get me wrong, I believe in courting vs dating, BUT they believe that courting should only be done with other family members present. HUH? I agree...have your date meet your family, go on group dates, etc, but you also need that time alone with your partner. When they announced that their daughter was courting on the People Website this week, I read it, and I was actually worried for her. It seems that all they talk about is theology and scripture. Yes, that is important, but you need to also talk about other things as well. And again, going on dates alone is important.

Another is modesty. I am all for modesty, but I believe they are going to the extremes. And they seem to "blame" or put it all on the women to be modest. What about the guys that they are with, or that are looking at them? Do they really have to have undershirts underneath their tops? Why can't the girls wear capri pants (I only wear those in the summer, anyway), and the boys wear boy (long) shorts? I think this is rather funny, since you can clearly see the girls wear make up.

Another is homeschooling. Again, I was homeschooled, so I am not going to say much, but this, along with going to a house church, along with not getting out also leads to thinking ONLY of what their parents think. The older ones have to help the younger ones with their school work. How are they supposed to do their own work?

There is more I could talk about...lack of internet usage (who cares, really), lack of TV, (meh...not as big of a deal), discipline, the fact that they supposedly use the Bill Gothard program (I don't know about that for sure, but it could very well be true), their courting vs dating beliefs, etc. But what I think REALLY got me thinking twice about this family, was what happened at the end of last season. Josh and Anna were wanting to move to Washington, DC, and JB clearly didn't want them to go (ok, I don't remember exactly what he said, but it was similar). Yes, my parents can be a bit too involved in our lives, but they would never (unless it was harmful) tell us what to do, where to go, etc. Yes, my parents tell us to either do or not do things when we ask, and I know that J&A did ask them, but they (the parents) seemed bit too much into their lives. Almost as if he wanted to control them. I think that this is the thing that bugs me the most. They want to control them. They want them close. I don't think that that is always a good thing. We kids need to have time away from our parents, even if it is for a year. My parents always have encouraged us to go to Bible College for at least one year. If we want to go to school or travel, or get a job after that, great! It seems that the Duggars want to keep their kids close....not sure if that is my idea of a fun time.

So, there you have it. Those are only some of my concerns for this family. But I will continue to watch it. Why? Like I said before, it is a clean show, and it just nice to watch. The little kids are funny, and I do like seeing what they are doing with their lives.

2 comments:

Sky-Ann @ The Little Button said...

Hi April when you get time I hope that you will have the chance to check out that I nominated you for one of my favorite blogs!!! It is for the Libester award :)

You can check out the details here if you would like to accept :)

http://thelittlebutton.blogspot.ca/2013/09/the-liebster-award.html

Hope your having a GREAT day!!!

Musings of a Childless Mama said...

awww...Sky-Ann..you are so sweet! Thank you!!! I am going to check it out right now...I actually already have...thanks so much!!!