Sunday, July 21, 2013

I'm Just so Tired..

First off, I will write about my girls getaway tomorrow, or Tuesday..Whenever, cause it is my blog, and I can do what I want, right?

Also, just to warn you, this is a grumpy post; please feel free to leave comments, but if they are not positive ones, then don't bother. Yes, I am also aware that 90% of this is self-inflicted, and I am aware that we got ourselves in this situation, and that I am aware solutions on how to get us out. I am venting. If you don't like a venting post, well, stop reading now.

I am just so tired of being broke all the time.
I am just so tired of living under people who's floor was put in a year ago, where you can hear everything. All. The. Time. (subflooring was clearly not considered, or not put in properly)
I am also tired of living in a 1970's building that has very little (noise) insolation.
I am just so tired of eating like crap, and not exercising.
I am just so tired of not having the job that I really want (or goes along with my schooling I just put 11K on). Yes, I love my job at the store, and I am VERY grateful for it, but I would love a part time job (preferably working with kids), so I can use my skills.
I am just so tired of having a grumpy husband 80% of the time. I was hoping that we could go for a slurpee/walk date when I got home tonight, but refused to go out.
I am just so tired of having a husband who is mad (and therefore, not very close to God) most of the time.
I am just so tired of reading "perfect" blogs. Doesn't anyone else there have a not so great life? Every single blog I read is about people going out and doing things every day. How can you possibly afford that?
I am just so tired of watching/seeing/reading of people having fun, and us barely scraping by (and by scraping by, I mean wondering if we are going to have enough gas to get us through the wk).
I am just so tired of ME being mad at God most of the time (or at the very least, feeling far away), and beseeching/screaming to Him to please bring me a job; among other things.
I am just so tired of having ailment upon ailment. Honestly, if I get another condition/disease, I give up!
I am just so tired of seeing/hearing/reading about pregnant women complaining that they are sick, fat, whatever. You get to have a baby; enjoy it!
I am just so tired of feeling stressed and overwhelmed over/about our situation. I am too overwhelmed I can't even cry.
I am just so tired of living in a house full of (my husband's) crap; ie. workshop in our kitchen.
I am just so tired of us not seeing eye to eye on things.

I could go on and on, but these are the things that bother me the most.

This all being said, I had a great girls getaway, even though it was much too short. I hope all you had a great weekend!

3 comments:

Laurie Tester said...

I love your honesty! We don't have children, but I believe it's mostly because we have never tried. We would try a few months and then our lives would go back to working all the time or something. It was too overwhelming for me so I didn't focus on it. We barely scrape by, robbing peter to pay paul every week. We do find things to do that are free or cheap and somehow make it work. Your blog is a great place to find people of like minds, like frustrations. It's also a great place to be honest. I think most people are afraid of sharing that life isn't perfect. Our life certainly isn't. There's nothing wrong with being TIRED!

April said...

My biggest stress is not something I have made known to people. It starts with the death of my mother six years ago continues to this day. A month ago I was made executor of an estate that has been mismanaged for six years. The last few months have been the worst. On my birthday I found out that my parents' home was about to be foreclosed because taxes have not been paid. It was a terrible day, but no one but my husband and brother knew. I think a lot of people try to put their focus on the good stuff, but that doesn't mean everything is so perfect.

Ali said...
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