Friday, April 3, 2015

We're the 1 in 6

A while back, I came across (again) this video  on someone's blog.  It is Kelly Coffey's "I Would Die for That". I had seen it before, and I LOVED it, and as I listened and watched it again, there is a part where the couple is holding a sign, and that says they are 1 in 10 couples who are infertile. I decided to find out what the stats were of infertile couples were in Canada, which I found wer 1 in 6. Imagine the irony, then, when, the other day, I was up late (as usual), and was trying to find some info on infertility bloggers and (if any) infertility photographers, when I stumbled up Infertility Awareness Association of Canada's website (which was probably where I got my information, and when I had posted-but not started on-the title) only to then go to their FB page, where I FORGOT that I had "liked it", AND then to discover that they are doing the #1in6 Campaign! They are doing the hashtag on ALL Social Media, to bring light to infertility. It is also (which I had no clue) is Canadian Infertility Awareness Week May 19-28th. I had the above picture as profile picture for a day, which is now changed for the Easter Wknd, but I will have it back up after, where it will remain until after the 28th (ok, I may take a break and switch it up for awhile..cause I get tired of seeing the same profile picture). I thought that it was funny that I had named this post the 1 in 6, and then to find out that they are doing a campaign with the same name. How cool is that? :)

I could bring awareness to infertility, and try to get Canadian Health Care to fund IVF, and other procedures, as well as get more funding for adoption for couples all I want (which is wonderful and MUCH NEEDED), but I think what ALSO needs to be talked about is how MANY couples (such as myself) will never be able to have a bio baby, nor will they be able to adopt. Simply put, you have to have money, and health to adopt a baby. Yes, my brother and sister-in-law did it, and that is wonderful, so please don't get me wrong, but unless you have at least $10K, health, etc, it doesn't happen. So, what I want to do, is yes...bring awareness to the fact that costs thousands of dollars to even ATTEMPT to have a bio baby (cause let's face it...IVF, Donor eggs/sp**m, IUI doesn't just happen on its own!), but also to shed light on the fact simply put, there are lots of couples that for health (like ours) reasons (as well as infertility) just won't be able to have a baby. It's that simple. I am wanting to bring awareness of the HURTING, and LONELINESS, ISOLATION that infertility can does bring. Hubby and I do talk about these things, but I am sure he doesn't tell me everything (nor I to him) on how he is feeling/thinking.

Chances are, there are couples in your circle that are dealing with this. Even if they don't talk about it openly and outright.You don't see them crying at night. You don't see the hurt in their eyes every time there's a baby dedication or baptism at church, the agony of going (or not going) to a baby shower, the sadness that each holiday brings. And don't let the fact the IF they have adopted fool you; yes, they have had a baby, but they still struggle with those thoughts and feelings. Believe me. It may not be as prevalaint, or as near the surface (or maybe it is), but it is there. Adoption is no easy task, either, and I am not just financially. It's a whole other gammit of feelings...feelings I don't even know exist. What really bugs me about infertility is that NO ONE talks about it. Yes, there are some great groups/websites out there, and that is awesome. And it is getting more press/social media time, but there still needs to be more, and I don't even know on how/what it would look like. I would love to do a run/walk to raise money for research, and for couples who are trying to have a baby. I would love to talk about it to family and friends more. I wish I was brave enough to start something and/or speak about it. Truth is, I think a lot of people shut down when you bring it up. Even **I** shut down when someone asks us about having kids (though most people don't..just people whom I have met). I don't want to talk about it; mainly b/c I know that they will not want to talk about it after I tell them we're an infertile couple Just like cancer, and other diseases that were hardly talked about even 20 years ago, we NEED to talk, to learn, TO LISTEN, and gain understanding about this disease, and yes it IS a disease!

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