This morning, I called my friend D. to catch up, since we haven't talked for awhile. She is a BLM (Baby Loss Mama), having lost her baby boy at 23 weeks. We talked for an hour this morning, and I hope what I said was encouraging. I never really know what to say, but I try to stay away from "platitudes". I would think this Christmas would be hard for her...I was talking to another FB friend of mine, asking her if I should include T's name in the Christmas Card or not...she emailed back, saying to definitely refer to Baby T. somewhere in the card, and to also try and get him an ornament.
Well, I tried for over an hour today (actually, probably about two), to find something. I think I should go into the "Angel Baby" making business. There is NOTHING out there! I did find one, but it also said "Baby's First Christmas 2011", and I don't know if that is fitting or not.
I don't know if she will be getting a lot (or any) gifts for him...if he will have a stocking..but I wanted to give her something, to show that I am thinking of/praying for them. But what do you give to someone who's baby they have lost?? Nothing really seems to fit quite right. I was looking for an angel ornament, or SOMETHING..I even found a cute bear, and was planning on getting his name engraved, but it was too expensive. I came away from the mall kind of sad, wishing I could get them something. So, I am still looking.
I don't know what it is like to be a BLM, but I DO know what it is like to feel a sense of loss. We talked about that today, too. Neither of us want to celebrate Christmas this year. It's just another reminder that we don't have children. No kids to take to see Santa, no one to cook/bake with us, no little eyes that light up when they see the Christmas Tree, lights, or gifts. I hope that if you have someone in your life who doesn't have children, or who has recently lost a baby, that you will be sensitive to them...hug them, let them talk...love on them!!